


A Bittersweet Victory

by Shipsrmythirst



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Not Canon Compliant - Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days, Not Canon Compliant - Kingdom Hearts III, Payback, dubcon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-07-30
Packaged: 2020-07-27 10:51:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20044786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shipsrmythirst/pseuds/Shipsrmythirst
Summary: Axel and Saix have a complicated relationship after becoming Nobodies. Things get to the point of becoming toxic, but they can get through this. they have to.





	1. Sweet

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fic in like 2015 and never passed it over to here. So, enjoy! haha

Part 1 - Sweet   
  
Saix had paced around in his room for what seemed like ages, just thinking about what Axel could possibly be planning. Now, he lay in bed, eyes closed as a sigh escaped his lips. "Keep your mouth shut." The sound of Axel's quiet, angry voice was still clear in his mind. He'd say that it 'hurt' him, even now as it echoed over and over, but he knew better than to presume to have any sort of emotion. That was a secret that he was never allowed to let out. Saix began thinking of other things, or attempting to, like about mission assignments for the following day and how to fix the plans that have fallen to pieces. He was deep in thought when the sound of his door sliding open startled him.   
  
Nonchalantly, he turned his head to look at the doorway, his face serious as always. Somewhere, within his heart or his soul or whatever he supposedly still had – Xemnas only knew – deep down he knew who it was.   
  
"Is there a problem?" The emptiness of his words weighed heavily between them, and Axel stood in the doorway with his arms crossed for a few more seconds.   
  
Without saying a word, Axel closed the distance between them, the door sliding shut behind him. What words could he say? He had nothing. Nothing that wouldn't just be blatantly ignored by the arrogant Nobody of his Isa. Saix. He let out a small breath and narrowed his eyes down at Saix, now at his bedside.   
  
"Axel. If you have nothing to discuss, go to your room and go to sleep," he almost sounded like the superior when he gave orders like this, and it made him feel empty, "You'll be useless tomorrow otherwise."   
  
Saix then turned his face to the other side and closed his eyes, waiting for the frustrating – is frustration an emotion? – pyromaniac to leave the room. The sound of movement made him look up, only to find Axel's face merely centimeters from his own.   
"Axel," Saix had meant to say it like a question, but couldn't get words out correctly when he was so close. Still, Axel didn't say a word.   
  
Instead, he put a hand to Saix's chin, pushing it upward with his fingers as he pressed his lips to the other's neck. It started out sweet, but even though Saix was showing obvious signs of not wanting to give in – which was usually because he wanted to be the dom – Axel ignored him, biting into the stubborn Nobody's skin roughly. Saix let out a sound that satisfied him, and he went on, spreading them all over his neck and chest. The nudging palms that had initially been pressed against his chest and sides now became the fingers digging into his back.   
  
Axel hoped Saix understood why he was there, why now, and why like this. He hoped he could communicate everything that had been on his mind without words because words were utterly eluding him. What could he say that would do the situation justice? He couldn't mend things. He couldn't forgive Isa, either. Saix. Saix. He sighed into Saix's chest, having already pulled down the zipper of his coat. The other made a sound as if to protest, but Axel didn't give him time, immediately pressing his lips to his chest and then his teeth, all the while his hands caressing Saix's body over and over. Axel wondered if Saix would hate him for being a tease, but that quickly went away, for he knew a Nobody couldn't hate, let alone worry.   
  
This always happened. Saix hated it. He was the one who came up with the plans, he was the strong one, he was the one with a piece of Xehanort inside him, so he should be able to overpower this…this urge, this yearning, this breathtaking longing that he never quite understood. He always chalked it up to past memories of their time together, but it always left a little nagging sensation in the back of his mind, like maybe…maybe this is what it was like to really feel, maybe this was…maybe this was a heart? He knew he shouldn't have feelings like that yet, it hadn't been nearly enough time, but still, this…sensation…always overcame him. He was…weak. In the end, he didn't really hate it at all. He couldn't help but give in. The pull was too strong, and even if his mouth tried to say stop, his body was clearly telling him to say yes. It was this suffocating need that he only felt at times like these, like a reminder of something he'd had once – too long ago – that slipped away before he could fully capture it.   
  
Saix couldn't stop the moans from coming out of his lips, and he wished so desperately that he could ask for more, but he would never beg – never. He was far too hard-headed to ever admit his need, even as his body betrayed him. The brush of lips against his chest spread goosebumps throughout the rest of him, and it was all he could do to keep from pulling him closer. He was stubborn indeed. Axel moved to Saix's hips, caressing and kissing them gently for a few seconds before abruptly stopping and looking up to meet yellow eyes. They were so full of expression, it was this that Axel wanted the most when they were together, and thus why he preferred being the tease over the teased. He evened himself up with the other Nobody, sliding his fingers into his silky blue hair and touching their foreheads together. The yellow eyes widened for a moment, taken aback by the sudden action.   
  
Suddenly, a pleasant, breathless moan resonated from him as Axel ground their hips together gently. He smirked, and Saix narrowed his eyed him as his face grew serious again. Axel did it once more, and this time Saix couldn't alter his face, he was breathless. With that, Axel decided he was satisfied with his revenge and got up quickly. Saix shot straight up, turning his head to stare at the redhead blankly. He raised a hand to brush his messy hair back, trying to settle himself, but the act of being left so suddenly left him feeling much emptier than usual. Yes, before he had nothing, too – was nothing – but for a moment there it didn't feel like they were Saix and Axel anymore….they were just Isa and Lea, more than best friends.   
  
Axel smirked at Saix as he backed away, waving as he went.   
  
"Consider that payback~," he told his frustrating counterpart, as he backed out the door and into the hall. The door between them closed, but not before Axel caught a last glimpse of Saix's fallen face seconds before it shut completely.   
  
"Oh, man," he sighed, rubbing the back of his head, "Maybe I got a little too carried away…" He lingered on this thought as he went back to his room to get some sleep, wondering if Saix would hold a grudge the following morning… Granted, the revenge was justified, since Saix had been constantly hurting his two best friends, but he couldn't help but worry if maybe he hurt him somehow. Axel chuckled to himself as he lay down in his own bed, worry and hurt were not things he should concern himself over, after all. Stuff like that meant nothing to beings without hearts.


	2. Bitter

Part 2 – Bitter   
  
He ground his teeth, clenching his fists in anger. The marks on his body had yet to fade, and every time he saw them they sent a shiver through him. It was a pleasant shiver, and he knew, he knew he'd done it for this. For the after-effects. For the lingering torture of being unable to receive him wholly; the inability to have him then and there… It was a slow, cruel, drawn-out torture, Saix thought, and he grew furious as he craved the damn redhead more and more.   
  
It had only been a couple of days, but the urge to pin the idiot down and have his way with him was overwhelming, as the blood clots he'd left on his body throbbed ever so gently, like fingers lightly tracing his skin, serving as a soft reminder of where Axel's lips had caressed his skin. The leather of his gloves squeaked as his grip tightened again. He made up his mind, moving with deliberate steps so as not to stomp, to go find the tease. The shadow of the Luna Diviner nearly covered the door to the other's room, and he slowly took a step forward, making it slide open.   
  
Axel slept, but it wasn't a deep sleep. Somewhere in the background of his slumbering mind, he could sense that someone was in his presence. He rolled to his other side, though, ignoring the sensation and resuming his favorite pastime. An odd feeling began to spread throughout his body, though, starting at his neck then down his chest, by the time it reached his hips, his eyes had popped open. A startled moan escaped his lips as the other's lips gently teased him, teeth grazing the skin there. By this point, Axel knew it was Saix, but he was still just as surprised.   
  
"H-Hey," he managed to choke out just before Saix's fingers curled around the edges of his pants. A grunt this time as the motion caused his chest to rub up against Axel's already aroused self. He clenched his jaw, "What's the big…idea?" He'd meant that to come out as an even sentence, but the angry yellow eyes that met his emeralds nearly silenced him.   
  
"Isn't it obvious," he muttered, sinking his teeth into the other hip, harder this time now that he was finally awake, "Revenge."   
  
Saix could tell that Axel was still groggy from having been asleep, but he didn't care. The grunts and small moans coming from the redhead motivated him all the more. He would never admit it, but he enjoyed this. He loved being the tease, never the teased. He placed either hand on the sides of his pants, kissing down his happy trail and toward where his zipper was, grabbing it with his teeth and pulling it down. Axel's eyes widened as he did so, and he caught him biting his lip just before he threw his head back in another moan as Saix kissed the fabric of his boxers between the opening.   
  
Deep down, Saix was having fun. This was the best part. Seeing him writhe and arch, seeing his eyes meet his with such lust, begging for more. But this time, it wasn't just that. Any other time, he would have stopped teasing here, for fear of being too mean and losing the mood, but this time…this time he was willing to make Axel really beg. Just as the other began to prepare himself for what he thought was going to happen, Saix kissed his way up to Axel's neck, his lips leaving trails of faint caresses, his tongue tickling him in the best way, until his lips reached where his shoulder and neck met, and he paused. He took a second, to really take in the other's panting, how Axel's chest was rising and falling, how Saix could feel the heat of them both pressing together, and it made him smirk, it was quite satisfying.   
  
Axel squeezed his eyes shut as Saix blew on his neck; it made him shiver with need. He wanted so badly to just have him. The wait, this suspense, it was killing him. He knew, though, that if he gave in, Saix wouldn't be content, so he didn't say anything. Saix licked his neck as if preparing it, before pressing his lips against it and sucking on it, his tongue working the skin there, which had Axel shaking with pleasure. Saix's free hand had unbuttoned his own pants earlier, while Axel had been distracted, but now he could feel it, and it made his chest ache with longing. His arms wrapped around him, his fingers digging into his back as he let out a full-on moan this time, his legs opening, knees bending to allow them to rub together.   
  
A deep, evil chuckle resonated in Saix's chest as he felt the pyro silently ask for more with his low, grumbling moans, and his fingers kneading his hips. So, Saix placed his hands on the other's hips, lining them up with his own in one rough movement. The sound of Axel's gasp pleased him. Sliding his hands back up to intertwine with his hair, he pressed his lips to his neck to resume his work there. As he did this again, though, he slowly ground his hips against the other's, enjoying Axel's deep, agonized moans. Gently, he pulled his hair while also nibbling at his neck, grinding his hips against his a little harder. It was difficult for Saix, though he'd never say so, not moan and give in himself. The feeling of them rubbing against each other was making him want to melt, but he kept up his serious expression, had to keep himself in check, no letting his face slip. This was for revenge, nothing more, nothing less.   
  
Axel's nails dug into the blue-haired man's back roughly, wanting him to press against him harder. His breathing was becoming much heavier, and it was getting harder to think about anything other than how much he wanted him. At first, he'd let him go on so as to ease his anger, knowing what his purpose was, but now he just wanted more. His heart was pounding, and he was starting to get really, really hot. It had been so long since they'd had sex, so long since they'd been this close to each other, and his body ached from the need he felt. He exhaled into another moan as the other switched to the other side of his neck. Axel knew he'd have huge marks there later, but couldn't focus on that thought for very long, another thrust against him made him gasp into a low grunt, his skin covered in goosebumps, his body begging him to come inside.   
  
Yet…the only thought that kept coming back to Axel was how much it bothered him that Saix refused to kiss him.   
  
It didn't go unnoticed. In the entirety of this tease, Saix had not once kissed him. It made Axel feel empty, emptier than he usually felt – as a nobody – and he didn't like it. Deep down, he still had the faint inklings of attachment for him, Isa having been his best friend and later his only love interest for the longest time; he didn't like knowing that Saix was only in this for revenge right now like he was just any other guy… The need that weighed on his chest was too much for this to be just about payback. He bit his lip, knowing full well that what he was about to do could set him off and make him leave, but determined to do it anyway. He quickly tightened his legs around him, locking him in place, and then reached a hand up into his now sweaty hair, pulling him up from where he'd made his home at his neck. They met eyes for a moment, and Saix's went wide for a moment before narrowing.   
  
"I'm not done," he said in a cold tone, obviously annoyed.   
  
Axel smiled, laughing, "I know." He held his topaz gaze for a moment.   
  
He pulled him down towards him, and slowly tilted his chin with his free hand to connect their lips. Axel's hand was still on the back of Saix's head, and he could feel his immediate instinct to pull away, but he held him there without much force, licking his lips slowly before kissing him.   
  
When their lips met again, Saix couldn't pull away, even though he knew he should have. He just… He couldn't bring himself to say no to him. He couldn't be the hateful Saix when he was around him. It was like Axel had some sort of power over him, and that's what drove Saix crazy the most. They kissed, passionately, tongues entwining and playing together, lips getting bitten, before long they were making out without realizing. Saix could feel the warmth radiating from Axel's body intensified, and he started to come to his senses.   
  
He hadn't come here today for this. This was what Axel had thrown away… They were nothing anymore; Axel didn't care about their friendship, or what they had made together, the plans they'd had for years. Their relationship was nonexistent, and Saix knew it well. He detached their lips, meeting Axel's sad green eyes with his own empty yellow ones. This was what they were now. He went for his hips again, pressing them hard together before sliding up and down ever so slowly. He could feel Axel shivering from the sensation, and Saix put his face closer to his, giving his bottom lip a series of small bites. His moans were longer and deeper now, and his bottom was much more responsive, arching and tightening around him. It was then that Saix sprang up, jumping to his feet.   
  
"Revenge is bittersweet," Saix half-bowed, his tone and face serious and emotionless like always, "Goodnight."   
  
Axel shot up from his bed in one blindingly fast movement, pinning Saix to the wall by the door before he could reach his exit. Saix's expression broke at last, his eyes wide, his hands clenched into fists as he fought not to show any emotion. Axel met his eyes with sorrow, frowning as his lover looked so…fragile…so broken… He went in to kiss him again, but just as their lips were about to touch, he noticed Saix's eyes were squeezed shut. He dropped his head, pressing it against his chest.   
  
"What happened to us…" he whispered, his voice cracking. He pushed himself away from the wall, allowing the other to leave.   
  
As he reached the door, it opened, and before stepping out and hearing it closed, Saix turned over his shoulder to meet eyes with his former companion.   
  
"You changed."


	3. Victory

Part 3 — Victory

Lea's body was weak, his lungs struggling to get enough air as he panted through gritted teeth. It hurt… It hurt everywhere. His keyblade lie beside him, but he wasn't strong enough to grip it anymore, so all he could do was watch it shatter away, to wait for his call once again. It was all he could do to not cry in front of him. With his right arm bent so he could lean up and see him, he wrapped the other arm around himself, as if for comfort, the pain radiating throughout his entire body. The once love of his life stood before him, weapon at the ready, glaring with eyes that weren't his own, prepared to take his life…

But Lea didn't care. It didn't make him want to scream that he was about to die, it made him want to scream that…someday…Isa would come back, and he would live with that regret…forever. Coughing, the result of a sorry attempt to clear his throat, he tried his best to meet Saix's golden eyes. "Isa…" he called to him, his voice hoarse. Saix pulled up his claymore, pulling back to prepare his final strike, afraid of letting him speak, but also not yet prepared to see him go. The battle around them was starting to hit its climax, and Saix could no longer tell who would win this war, but it was like none of that mattered. His mind was split entirely in half, part of him wanting to finish this job and help his 'team', but part of him never wanting to hurt Lea… Lea…. His grip on the claymore wavered.

"Isa… Please," it was a rough whisper, a sorrowful plea. The Luna Diviner's eyes widened, not expecting to hear his name, his lips pursed to stop himself from responding. Once again, he lifted his claymore, pulling back as he prepared for the final strike. Using his momentum, he roared as anger overtook him, quickly launching his arm forward, aiming towards Lea's chest. During the swift motion, Saix heard Lea's soft words "…I just…wanted you back, Isa," as he felt like the claymore hit its mark.

His eyes were wide, his chest tight. No…No no no… Lea… This was never…the plan… Sadness. A feeling he hadn't experienced in a long, long time. It seemed to physically grip him, and he had to use the claymore for support as he fell to his knees, suddenly weak. Why… You were…all I had… A warm feeling began to expand from his chest to his arms and down his legs. He opened his eyes, not realizing they had been closed and looked up to see bright, green eyes staring back at him, a sheepish, but familiar, smile greeting him. A chilling hand pressed to his cheek, and the touch sent shivers down his spine, a touch he'd missed so much, but he pulled away, too shocked to process what was happening. Isa looked to his hands only to see the claymore firmly in the ground, centimeters away from Lea's side. He blinked in disbelief, confused as to what had occurred. I...missed? I..never miss… Did I…

It was then that he noticed the keyblade in his chest, but it was much too late to do anything about it. He fell, his world going black, and slipping away, his heart floating away. Lea's voice kept echoing from….somewhere, he couldn't tell anymore, but he just knew that his name was being said. "ISA! FIGHT BACK! DON'T LET HIM WIN!" Lea screamed at the top of his lungs, clutching his sides as he struggled to stay standing. He used his keyblade to help him stay upright, but even with how weak he felt, there was no giving up. He could see Xehanort's heart floating in a spiral alongside Isa's, both shining brightly as they tried to re-enter the body they had inhabited. The violent thrusts of his own heart against his chest made it hard for him to focus, but he shook his head, taking a deep breath. "ISA! YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO REMEMBER ME, GOT IT MEMORIZED!? COME BACK HERE, YOU JERK!"

Though everything pitch black, Isa could sense there was another presence there with him, but he didn't need to ask who it was, this presence had become as familiar to him as his own. "If you want my body, just take it… It…does not matter anymore," Isa's voice was full of apathy, his heart weak from all the pain and torment it had endured. A cynical smile he recognized was all he could see from afar. "Ah, I see. So the berserker has finally given up? It's about time you fully submit to my control," the smile became a grin. Just as sleep started to envelop him, the smile fading away from the distance, Lea's voice broke through his barrier. "…you…were the one…who was supposed to remember me…" the sounds of his screams came in like the shattering of glass, and it reached the very core of his heart.

Suddenly, Isa's eyes snapped open, not allowing himself to fall asleep. He stood; ready to take Master Xehanort on. "NO. I need my body back," he said with determination, "I…promised. I won't let the darkness pull me in again." The other stepped forward, finally showing himself, hands folded behind his back. "You're nothing but a child, you're weak. You already know I've won this battle. Why fight?" he laughed, amused. Isa's fist shook with rage, but he tried to stay calm, knowing his opponent was not to be taken lightly. Getting ready to speak, Isa took a breath but was cut off by Xehanort's voice. "What would you do…if he knew why you ended up this way?" Isa took a step back. No… That was his secret. He'd never told Lea, he hadn't ever intended to, either…

—

Isa's eyes opened, but they weren't the eyes Lea had been expected. He jumped back, keyblade in hand. Riku had healed him as they'd waited, the battle had ended before Isa had woken up. The winners of the war had been the Light, without any losses on their end, but it had been hard on everyone, and no one would be celebrating just yet. Especially not Lea. "Isa…?" he asked it desperately, hoping the eye color was just a permanent change instead of a sign. The unfamiliar wicked grin that placed itself on Isa's lips alerted him to the truth. "No. Give him back," Lea charged at Xehanort, anger lighting him literally on fire. He didn't have the energy to scream, anger making him calm and calculated. Xehanort laughed with Isa's voice, jumping up and away from the pyro. "His body is mine now, as it has been for a very long time," his eyes darted Lea to try again, but he only stood a few yards away, staring into those eyes he'd hated so much. "Isa…. ISA! I know.. I know you're in there…. We're…best friends…right?" I love you, his heart whispered the words he couldn't bear to say. Xehanort let out a spiteful laugh, "Friends? What a childish noti-"

—

"I'm talking to him right now, you see, and I think he should know…" With that, Isa didn't want to hear anymore, he wanted control of his body back. Running, his claymore appeared naturally in his hand, and he leapt in the air, swinging it down where Xehanort stood, but he'd used darkness to flash step away. Isa bared his teeth, growling as he turned around to face him again. "Give IN," he could feel his heart struggling to take control again as he growled his command.

—

The possessed Isa was on his knees, struggling to take control. Lea watched frozen as he fought, having been taken off-guard by the sudden collapse mid-sentence. Everyone had backed away, letting Lea handle his own fight, Sora feeling the bond between the two friends was strong than just friends, he knew Lea would be the one to bring him back, even if he himself didn't believe it, Sora had faith. So, everyone stayed back, watching in suspense, Riku, and Sora holding hands as they hoped. Isa clutched at his heart, groaning in pain. He looked up, blinking as he tried to clear his blurred vision. He could feel the weight of two hearts inside him, and it had never hurt like this before. They had coexisted for so long, but he didn't want that anymore. He pounded his fist into the ground, "Get OUT," he growled again, forcing himself to push the other heart away. "As if it were that easy to get rid of me," Isa's voice betrayed him.

"Your eyes…" Lea gasped, breaking free of his trance-like state. Isa's eyes were green and yellow, completely split in half. Slowly, he moved forward, leaning down to Isa once he reached him. He lifted his face, meeting his strange eyes. "Fight back," he told him sternly, "You have to come back so you can kick my ass." He smiled, though it was short-lived. The yellow returned to both eyes, but Lea stayed put. "Give him back," he could see the colors flashing back and forth quickly, and it gave him more hope. "There's something he should tell you," Xehanort! Isa laughed, "He never told you why he became one of me…did he?" Lea shook his head, shaking Isa by the shoulders, the colors still transitioning back and forth, he feared he'd lose Isa with Xehanort at this rate.

"You were my first choice," he smirked, but it quickly became a scream, as Isa kept fighting. Lea's face was shocked, his heart sinking to his stomach. Isa…had suffered..for so long…for…him? His vision began to blur, tears threatening to spill. No… All this time..he never knew… "Lea! You have to save him!" Sora yelled from behind, the wind of The Keyblade Graveyard carrying his voice and snapping him back to reality. It didn't matter right now, he had to bring him back. "Isa…" he whispered, his hand pressed to the other's cheek as he gave him a faint smile, "I'll always be there…to bring you back." Lea leaned in, closing his eyes as he pressed his lips to Isa's cold ones, trying to give him something to fight for. Isa snapped back into his body, the kiss catching him off guard, but he met his kiss before quickly pulling away, letting out a scream. "This is MY BODY," he yelled, using all of the strength he had left to purge what was left of the Xehanort inside him. "Destiny…has been written… This can't be…the end?" Xehanort groaned, reaching towards his Kingdom Hearts in the sky before dropping. The last of him finally faded away.


End file.
